Becoming and Being

Sometimes I'll see someone and I'll be inspired by them.

There was a lady on the beach with her three little kids that looked like she had it all together. She was slender and looked so nice in her Lilly Pulitzer swimsuit. She sat around and drank green tea from Starbucks. She was from Dallas and she was very nice. I remember thinking, "I should drink green tea too." The bad thing is that if given the choice between green tea and coffee from Starbucks, I very much doubt that I could force myself to get the tea. It's not that I don't like green tea, because I do. I just don't like it more than coffee.

I remember another time when someone was telling me about how they loved taking baths and pampering themselves in that way. I decided I would be a bath girl and even asked for bath stuff for my birthday. I maybe took one. For me, the idea of sitting in my own dirt is too gross to be able to get past in my mind and be able to sit and relax.

Another good example of being inspired by someone else is when I went to visit a new friend. Her house is gorgeous and she is crazy about organization and cleaning. Her house was unbelievable. When we went outside with the kids, even the swing set looked amazing. She then told me that she re-stains it every spring. Guess what I went home and did that weekend. I stained our swing set and pressure washed our deck and stained it too. Sometimes a little inspiration is all we need.

It is actually pretty rare for me to be inspired by someone and actually follow through (note the green tea and baths). Maybe it's because we mostly just are who we are. Or is it that who we think we are, we are?

I love to paint my nails extremely dark colors. The bad thing is that when I do, I feel like a fake. I guess I feel I am not "rock and roll" enough to pull that off. My husband doesn't like it either. There are times when I will love a certain look, but no way would I ever wear it because it is not "me". What does that even mean? If I like it, why can't it be me? It is funny to me that I struggle with that. I think it is because all of us are in a constant state of being and becoming. We are who we are; but we can change. I read on another blog (http://conorbootheandgirls.blogspot.com/) that we are like a maple tree; it is always a maple tree, but it is in a constant state of change. Every season brings something new. Every year, while it is still a maple tree, it is changed by weather and environment and will never be the same as even the year before. That is alot like people. We have great ability to change; but we in ways remain the same. We are changed by people who enter our lives and people who exit them. We are changed by circumstances and changes in our surroundings. We can be inspired to change or forced to. We are always being and becoming.